Saturday, September 27, 2014

a little bit of peace

well, mostly a little bit of quiet.
you can't stop the cat from meowing for food in your ear until you actually get up and feed her.
so i did.
then my add self found the coffee pot askew and decided to brew some.
for the past half hour i have been sitting, enjoying the aroma and taste of this delectable brew, watching the sun peek its way through the clouds and over the horizon, creating a hazy luminous glow above the apartment buildings across the street.

im in love with moments like this.
moments where i can't hear anything but the wind in the trees, cars driving in the distance, birds chirping, and the morning just beginning.
moments where coffee tastes like salvation and warms my body and soul to the core.
moments where smells are more prominent than ever before and awaken my senses to the new day.
moments where my brain is off and im just living in the moment that is.

this must be what life is supposed to be like.
too often i am riding that rollercoaster of life, unable to get off.
too often i am running through the crowded streets trying to get from point A to points B, C, D, E, F, and so on.
moments like this i feel calm and awake even tho my body wants to be back in my bed and my eyes just want to rest some more.

i started a new anxiety med last nite. 
i probably wont even feel any effects for a few weeks.
im just hoping i can get some sleep.
im just hoping my life can come to some kind of slower pace and maybe shift my brain from overdrive to geriatric speed.
cos if life is supposed to be lived like how i feel right now.... able to breathe, not plagued with thoughts of things that are not right now....i would very much like to move here and live here always.

now to hope bubs doesnt wake up for a little bit so i can enjoy this a tiny bit more... there's my selfish mommy thought for the day.

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