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Monday, October 1, 2012

what a difference a few hours makes

after a very bleak morning coming out of a nightmarish sleep fog and going straight into hours of putting everyone else first, i can honestly say i don't think i AM sitting on the fence. 
for all the naysayers that try to pull me back and into their downward-spiraling, dismal world of despair and cloudy days, im not going along any more.
maybe ill hop off this fence and venture into a land of smiley times and dance parties all alone, but i wont be alone when im there.
i dont know why i feel like i need to take everyone along with me.
im not responsible for everyone else.
(well in a sense i am with work and miss A, but..... you get it.)
all i can do is stand at the edge of the world i know is real and the fence that everyone is sitting on and call them over.  if they slap my outstretched hand, so be it.  i can try again, but why make myself sad and preoccupied with it.
everyone is on a little journey themselves anyway.  everyone's life is meant to be a learning experience and a whole lot of growth.  everyone will find their way eventually but it's their own way to find, not mine to find for them.

so now........... i think it's time to dance my little ass off (and once again scare the cat).  miss A makes a perfect dance partner though.  :)

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